Why yes...

...I am crazy!

Last night at a Relief Society activity, I was asked a question. The lady that asked it, said, "Can I ask you a seemingly rude question without it being rude?" (I love these kind of questions!)

She asked, "How old are you?"

I laughed!

I am 29 and a half (well, on the 17th I will be).

And I'm pregnant with baby number 6.

Steve and I will have been married for 10 years in June.

I had my first baby when I was 21.

I wasn't offended at all. But I still find it silly that even women in the church are shocked and amazed that I choose to get married at 19. That I choose to start having babies at a young age. That I choose to have them so close. And that we choose to have so many.

That means in 8 short years, I have had 6 kids. And I wouldn't change that for anything!

Yes, I dropped out of college to be a mom. Yes, I had said that I wanted to finish school before I was 30. Something tells me, that won't be happening.

And you know what? I'm ok with that. I can go to school once all the kids are in school. (Remember we want 7, so I still have one more child to bring into this world. It's gonna be a while before I set foot in a college again.)

Don't get me wrong. Motherhood has been a challenge for me. I hate being called a super mom. Because, I don't think I am. I'm not a hands on kinda mom. I don't do crafts with my kids. Teaching little kids doesn't come naturally to me. I have the tv on too much. Sitting down and reading with them is hard to do. We don't want to do it at the same time. And the constant, "I'm hungry" gets on my nerves! And to be frank, I can't stand little kids. 

In high school, when I was thinking about what age I wanted to teach, I knew that high school aged kids was what I really felt like I could do. Anyone younger than that, well, sorry, I can't handle.

I love my kids. I do. There are days I wonder why I got myself into this. And I love to serve other people. I will baby sit and watch anyones kids (as long as they aren't sick!) and all that. But ask me to teach, or to be hands on with them. Just shoot me instead, k?

But I love being a mom. I do things my own way. My kids might not go into school knowing how to read, or all of their ABC's. But they know that I love them. That I am and will be always there for them. That I will help them in whatever it is they need help with. And I hope that they know who they are. That they are a Child of God. And that He loves them as well, and will always be there for them.

I'm not destined to be something grand. I'm just suppose to be a mom. That's my calling in life. And yes, I am sure there are better moms out there then me. 

I confess, I yell. I get upset over the little things. I get tired of having to clean up after everyone. I get frustrated over the amount of laundry that keeps being reproduced. I get angry that no one seems to want to do their chores. My house is always a mess. I said I was suppose to be a mom, not a perfect mom!

So yeah, I know I'm a little weird for wanting so many kids. For having started at such a young age. For getting married and dropping out of college to put my family first. I don't fit the mold that the world has set for women my age. But I fit the mold the Lord has set for me. And that's all that really matters!



PS Only 5 more weeks to go! Hurry up and wait. :/